I wrote the following in my role with the Marine Education and Research Society to accompany the graphic below. Our efforts include workshops on Marine Mammal Regulations and the ethics of imagery and language used by mainstream and social media.
It is so jarring and unfortunate when wildlife encounters are described with language like “the whales put on a show for us”. No, they didn’t.
How I hope my words resound with you.
“It’s not a show.
Wildlife does not perform for humans. Whales do not “put on a show” for us.
Words matter. Words reflect, and perpetuate, our values and actions.
Thankfully, society has come a long way in understanding our connection to the natural world.
May our words reflect that we know the privilege of observing wild animals, living wild lives.
Not “for us”. Not “up close and personal”.
Rather, may we value most that what we observe in the wild happens . . . as if we weren’t there.”
The graphic is available as a sticker or card at our MERS Ocean Store. The card includes the above text. All sales support our research and education efforts.
Illustration made by friend Dawn Dudek based on a photo I took of Humpback Whale Inukshuk (BCZ0339) while conducting research for the Marine Education and Research Society (MERS) under Marine Mammal License MML-57.
I am daring to share the following with you, with Hannah’s permission. I do so because, we are all educators and, as I often express, education is like throwing seeds into the wind. Usually, we don’t know how, or even if, the seeds take root.
Hannah has gifted me an example of how a simple act from 22 years ago may have contributed to someone’s path. Yes, I cried upon reading this. I am crying again now.
“Dear Jackie,
I wanted to give you this memory you so appreciated hearing. If I were an artist, I would draw or paint or somehow physically create this moment for you. Instead, as a linguist, I will do my best to describe it.
A flurry of sensory information was hitting my not-yet-developed brain, so I don’t have many specifics for this memory. I know two things: this memory is one of my first, and I was on the Gikumi, so I felt safe. [Gikumi was the beautiful wooden boat then used by Stubbs Island Whale Watching].
Sight: I sat facing one of the doorways, so my view of the outside was framed. Strangers swiftly appeared and disappeared as they walked along the deck. The land gently rose and fell when some wake hit the boat. It wasn’t too bright for my young, blue eyes. I know now that a slightly cloudy day makes for better nature watching…enough light but no glare.
Sound: The radio blared with voices and static. Captain Jim lowered the volume. Boats engines hum in the distance. A dozen strangers’ voices chatter, so there must not have been whales yet. Something about whales makes us go silent. I’ve always liked that. Even my busy, loud brain goes silent with them.
Smell: Coffee. Mom always had coffee. The breeze never quite made it around that doorway, so the smell of the ocean would arrive later.
Touch: Mom had on a rain jacket, so the arms that surrounded me felt a bit loud for my fingers. Some people understand that a feeling can be loud. It is like how linen is not smooth or rough, but somehow loud to feel. My life jacket provided me with consistent, surrounding pressure, like a hug. I never minded wearing it. Sitting on Mom’s lap, I didn’t have to worry about balance. She held me tightly as the waves made the boat rock. This is a comforting feeling for me, like a vertical rocking chair.
Taste: Captain Jim gave me a cookie. Yum.
The boat continued to glide forward. Suddenly, there was a pickup of chatter and movement. My eyes darted around. Too young to listen to or understand a naturalist talk, I didn’t really know the kinds of creatures that could appear or nature I could experience.
Then, a familiar face appeared in the doorway. It was your kind, sociable, empathetic, and passion-filled face. Your face had excitement in it. Not on it, like a painter choosing an emotion for the subject or a reaction learned through customer service. The excitement was in it. It was true. You said something to Mom, and she plopped me down from her lap and lifted me over the door frame.
This is the vivid moment in my memory. I don’t have much of a mind’s eye. I can’t “see” anything when I read books, and I always thought “picture this” was a metaphor, not an actual instruction. But in my mind, I can see blue-grey sky with your hand reaching down for mine. I take your hand, and it feels warm. You guide me to the bow and position me by the rail. You squat down so you can talk to me, not over me. Your left arm is around me, holding me safe and steady. Your right hand switches between holding the rail and pointing to the water. You brought me out to see the Dall’s Porpoise riding Gikumi’s bow.
This is when I feel the cool wind on my face and smell the slightly salty water. It smells green and blue. The open ocean just smells blue to me, but where we are also smells green. I now know it is the lower salinity, but you intelligently didn’t try to educate me on that fact. Instead, you instruct me to look at how the porpoises glide through the water and move up and down for air. I see the water turn white when they disturb the surface. I hear the puffs of them breathing. You point to their tails and tell me to look at how fast they can go.
I don’t have the ability yet to “wonder” in the sense of pondering or thinking, but I do have the ability to “wonder” in the sense of awe. This new information could have skidded past my brain as unintelligible data too complicated to process. But you took the time to help me see it and help me learn it. You crouched down to my physical and mental level to help me see what you see in this incredible world.
This moment sparked the joy that began my passion for cetaceans. It isn’t the joy that is synonymous with happiness. It is the Joy that C.S. Lewis talks about: an unsatisfied desire for and lifelong pursuit of God. He describes Joy as a longing that comes to you in pangs as you head in the right direction toward God. At this point in my life, I simply consider God to be the ultimate source of goodness. My pangs of Joy are when I feel like I am heading in the right direction toward whatever meaning my life is supposed to have. I believe it is good to pursue knowledge of the world around me, even if it is just for knowledge’s sake. At least, it is good to pursue finding meaning. I think I found my purpose in killer whale research. You sparked that Joy, and I thank you.
Be well, Hannah Cole”
Hannah is clearly an extraordinary writer, and human. Her undergraduate degree is in Computer Science and Computational Thinking with a minor in Philosophy, she is pursuing a Master’s in Linguistics. From Hannah: “I want to combine these into a PHD in Natural Language Processing, studying the language of killer whales. Dr. John Ford discerned their linguistic variation, and I hope to use artificial intelligence to discern any meaning that may be present.”
Here’s to the salty sisterhood of cold-water divers (and the men with whom we submerge). I am a week late with posting this for “Women’s Dive Day”. Yes, it’s been busy.
But, it’s still really important to me to put these photos into the world and reflect on how much this sisterhood means to me, and why. I have tears in my eyes as I type this, so apparently, the feelings run deep.
Scuba sister Jacqui Engel with Egg Yolk Jelly.
Why? Because you may have noticed that, by some, there is an increasing downward pressure on womxn in an attempt to limit the spaces in which we expand and the choices we WILL make. Because some want to hold on to the assumption of inherent privilege based on the absurd “criteria” of skin pigmentation; whether one’s chromosomes have one X or two; or gender identification. Because some fight equality to claim superiority.
I now have some pretty good expletives in my head which I will not type here.
Scuba sister Natasha Dickinson and Sunflower Star. We documented the same one over a span of 71 days. It’s the sea star species that was / is impacted the most by Sea Star Wasting. This individual is on an anchor block covered with encrusting coralline algae.
Of many examples of times it has become very clear to me that being a womxn* in science and scuba is important, let me share the following:
On a really hot day, I was “show and tell” for two children in our community. I dressed up in all my dive gear (the full weight and heat of it) and walked down the hallway and into the classroom with Cayden’s little hand in mine on one side, and Sophia’s little hand in mine on the other.
I walked in as a surprise to the other students. I then was gifted the time to talk about the science of the dive gear and the life that lived in the cold Ocean; our neighbours who were just below the surface of where we lived.
I took the equipment off piece by piece after explaining what it did. The children chose to try to lift the weights and cylinder and we discussed pressure and buoyancy (always good metaphors ).
In the course of this, among so many moments the filled my heart, a little boy looked up at me. He had such an open expression on his face and he said . . . “You’re my first scuba diver”.
I was his first scuba diver – me an older woman, speaking for science and the sea, engaging not in an elevated way but in a way that invited them all to follow where their loves took them, and yes, I was wearing a bright green tutu.
Scuba sister Janice Crook.
How does this help shape the future? We will never know will we? We are all projecting our energies and images into places where we might increase what is good in the world, or suppress it.
From the depths, love to you my scuba sisters, and to the men we swim beside. Respect and gratitude to all who shine their light so that others may follow; who do NOT push others down in an attempt to feel elevated. That’s such a tragic and transparent indicator of being a hollow human.
Below: A slideshow to honour some scuba sisters.
For those that may not have seen the use of “womxn” before. The spelling of womxn is a feminist choice in two ways. It removes the “m-a-n” from “woman” and “m-e-n” from “women”. It’s also an acknowledgement that I am including trans and non-binary humans when I use the word.
My final words for 2021. Squeezed out of my heart, head and hands. I need this for myself, to focus on what matters. As always, I hope it has value to you too.
Wishing you health And the heart To help those Slowed along the way
Wishing you weather That does not Flood, burn Nor twist
Wishing you strength To see Truth and fact And what is not
Wishing you endurance To run the race Dodging pitfalls positioned For disappearance into despair
Wishing you balance Not to flirt with vertigo But to right yourself When you fall (because you will fall)
Wishing you love That mirrors back The good of Who you are
Wishing you joy Laughter that fills And makes your Belly shake
Wishing you wonder That stops you In your tracks And you are small again
Wishing you silence Amid stridency Buy, buy, buy Never enough (always too much)
Wishing you vision To know the way To what matters Now, always
Wishing you wild For if there is wild There is all Of the above
I recently had the great joy of meeting artist Nico Kos Earle through another artistic powerhouse, Dawn Dudek.
In this meeting, Nico referenced a line from her poem “We Are the Flood” that hit me full force with its power to capture so succinctly the reality of we humans and climate change. That line is: “We are the weather makers“.
Below I share the full poem with Nico’s permission. There is so much in the words that moves me and fortifies my resolve. May it do the same for you. 💙
Poem: Nico Kos Earle Image: Horizon the Humpback by yours truly.
The following content has been very well-received on my social media. Therefore, I am sharing it here too.
Daring to share . . .
This belongs here, on my page, where ultimately it’s about the welfare of future generations; about equity and connection.
Through recent international “realties”, to situations impacting the welfare of other species and dear friends, I have gained even more insight into how power structures enable abuse and how, at their core, it’s about keeping others small, and preferably . . . silent.
I see, and live, how disparity in power means that those working for equality, truth and justice bleed out time, energy and expense into strategizing to navigate these power systems, adding another layer of disadvantage.
I have felt anger boiling up and exhaustion creeping in. I am an older woman which means . . . I can’t.
Those of us with power must help those who have less, for that is a life well-lived. It does not mean that we have to carry it all. But imagine a world where many more of us recognize and reject the forces that strive to diminutize, divide, distract, and paralyze, and rise into our power to create positive change and help others. More of us united. That’s the world I will continue to work for.
The blog I am referencing is at this link. And yes, by writing this post and that blog, it clears my head, adds to my resolve, represents what motivates me most, and hopefully is of use to others.
Yes I am toying with this idiom to get your attention dear community.
Please read. Please take just a few minutes to check in with yourself. Please share if this resounds with you.
This week the findings of a very big, very important report went into the world. Likely you noted the heft of it; urgent words accompanied by imagery of burning, flooding and/or orange, red and yellow graphs?
Yes, I am talking about the 2021 report by the Intergovernmental Committee on Climate Change. Stay with me! What was your reaction? What did you feel? What will you do?
Take a few minutes please to reflect on this. Was it an emotional cocktail of overwhelm, fear, despondency, shutdown? This would be so understandable, especially for you who are already striving for so much socio-environmental good. But, BUT reflect on the amplified danger of this.
If we shutdown, if it is “too much”, if we bury it, or if we reject . . . where is the action? Where is the resolve and dedication to change? Where is the empowerment? Where is the future?
It is such a difficult and delicate dance in how to communicate the urgency for change while not stimulating the fear that catalyzes paralysis or for “hope” to replace action.
What to do? Feel it and then . . . do it.
We don’t need to be perfect in our actions. That notion also manipulates / debilitates us into eco-paralysis. But we do need to act.
At the very core of what needs to be done is that we need to reject that the use of less fossil fuels is about loss. We need to know the great gains achieved by our consumer and voter actions. We need to act on the knowledge of the common solutions to so many problems being achieved through less fossil fuels, less consumerism (consumerism most often fuels fossil fuel use), and more nature.
We need to model the happiness that comes from empowerment and valuing our reliance on the natural world (like the kelp and trees that absorb our carbon).
We need to embrace that disempowerment is not only individually disabling, it is the denial by those who have power over the rights and choices of others.
For those who have found their way here but, for whatever reason, are not able to believe there is a climate crisis, my empathy to you. If this post provokes you, there is emotional truth in that too. There are of course deep reasons for why you believe what you do. Please know that I understand but I will not tolerate any comments that are motivated by countering precaution and/or countering science and reasoned and respectful dialogue.
This is me 21 years ago, about a week after I got “mask squeeze” on my 37th birthday. I came across the photo recently when looking for a bio picture for a presentation. It was taken as a staff photo when I had the joy of teaching children with special needs.
I found myself staring at the photo, at younger me, and thinking of how much has been learned since then. I am sharing with you because . . . because why? Sure, there’s a lesson in physics here but that’s not it. There’s also maybe something of value in how the most important things in life sometimes don’t come easy. But more, it’s about what I have learned in these years, what I strive to put into the world, and why.
It won’t surprise you to know that you can’t be the same after you’ve been punched in the face by the Ocean. So here goes:
Mask squeeze happened on my twentieth dive when I did not know enough to realize how little I knew. It was my second birthday back in British Columbia after my many years of teaching in the Netherlands.
I was on a dive trip to some of the most challenging conditions on our coast. The accident happened during one of my first dives in a dry suit. I now know it was madness to be doing my first dives in a dry suit in such challenging conditions. But it was the result of some human chaos and unreliability whereby the suit was not ready when it was supposed to be. Thereby, I could not practice before the trip and get used to the change in buoyancy from my Dad’s old, thin wet suit.
On that 20th dive, when I rolled into the water off the boat, my fin slipped off my suit. My mask flooded. I did not realize I was holding my breath as I tried to grab the fin. I continued to descend whereby the pressure in my mask did not equalize. BOOM! The pressure of Mother Ocean pushed against my mask and blew out every capillary in my eyes.
From my dive log back then: “ Whatever it took, it was SO worth it. Astounding, astounding life. So grateful to my dive buddies who helped me and who decided the dive site should now be named Shiner Rock.” Yep, I have a little island unofficially named in my honour.
It was a powerful lesson in shaping me on this path . . . the vital importance of humility, respect, and knowing one’s place in the natural world.
Since then, I have metaphorically faced equivalent injuries, usually inflicted as a result of human ego and disconnect from understanding how our actions impact future generations.
The resulting process has been the same: learn, heal, surface, and repeat.
I will admit too that this photo makes me reflect on the few who say to me “You’re so lucky” or who have had the need to try to blow out my fire. I am so very lucky in many ways but, as much as I do not know the journeys of others, very few know my path. There have been difficult choices made and painful lessons learned. We’ve all had those.
I’ve written about having mask squeeze once before, after my 800th dive over seven years ago. There I reflected: “The Ocean is the source. The battle force. She is my inspiration. She is the beginning and she is the end. She is where I hide and where I am fully exposed. She has taught me my most valuable lessons and . . . . I know it’s not over yet. Not by a long shot.”
I thank all who carry me forward – from my dive buddies to you who signal shared values and understanding. Please know how much direction you give.
Onward, fuelled by lessons learned and knowing what matters most. 💙
See this link for my previous blog about mask squeeze and lessons learned: “My 800th Dive. From Shiner to Shining?” from January 2014.
And while everyday is an earth day for those of us on this blue planet, April 22nd is a day to increase resolve to live knowing our place IN the environment, because that’s where greatest well-being lies.
With this also being my birthday, maybe there is even greater reflection and taking stock – the lessons learned; the how-did-we-get-here; what has changed; what has not; the way forward; how much time is left . . . you know, the big stuff.
The privilege of reaching this age includes that there is more knowing of what has been, which helps inform how to move forward. There is greater understanding of the pushes and pulls on human values, and a greater ability to see over greater timelines, and know common solutions.
Yeah, my head does not spin as much at this age.
THAT was my clumsy segue to the following. For a long time, I’ve wanted to share “The Ark Video” which dates back to 1988. I found it so powerful at that time and believe it still has value and “deserves” to live on the internet, where it may still have positive impact.
The video features Dawn French as Mother Earth, scolding humanity, her children. You know Dawn French. She’s the fabulous British comedian of the “French and Saunders” duo, the “Vicar of Dibley”, the “Fat Lady in the Painting’ in Harry Potter, etc.
Look! The video is so old, it was on VHS and I had it converted to DVD. A reminder that 1988 was pre-internet and before most of us had computers.
There’s that reflection again: How quickly some things change, while others do not, and . . . why?
Watch the video with that in mind?
Note that the organization being promoted, The Ark Environmental Foundation, never proceeded with the promise this video provided. They faded out by the early 1990s. I don’t know why. There were big names involved. Kevin Godley of the rock band 10cc was the director of the video and I believe David Bowie was associated with Ark too.